The Ramblings of a Somewhat Unstable Mind

Posts tagged ‘posts’

Word of the Day: May 19, 2012

Bwospat

 

(Bwah-Spss)

Now all I need to do is my nails and I’m ready to watch Grey’s Anatomy!

 

 

An acronym standing for “Bloggers Who Only Submit Posts About Themselves”.  Most of these posts, which are usually extremely short, show pictures of their nails or their outfit for the night.

 

 

 

*NOTE;  HELP!!!  IF YOU HAVE ANY SUGGESTIONS FOR A FAKE, BLOGGING-RELATED WORD OR ACRONYM THAT YOU LIKE, DESPISE OR USE, PLEASE LEAVE IT AS A COMMENT, ALONG WITH A SHORT DEFINITION AND THE PHONETICS. YOUR SUGGESTIONS WILL BE AN UPCOMING DAILY FEATURE!

 

 

CONTENTS OF THIS BLOG ARE SUBJECT TO CHANGE WITHOUT NOTICE. WORDS MAY APPEAR CLOSER IN A MIRROR THAN  THEY ACTUALLY ARE. 9 OUT OF 10 LIBRARIANS  ARE MOUSEY INTROVERTS, 19 TIMES OUT OF 20, YET STILL MANAGE TO APPEAR TO BE SEXY. THIS SITE IS NOT ENDORSED BY THE SPCB (THE SECOND SPC (SOCIETY FOR THE PREVENTION OF CRUELTY) IN THE PHONE BOOK – THE SPCA (ANIMALS) HOGGED THE FIRST SPOT ON ME AGAIN! THOSE BRUTES!) THE APATHETIC AND APPALLINGLY APROPOS “SOCIETY OF THE PREVENTION OF CRUELTY TO BLOGGERS” (DONATIONS ACCEPTED AND SUGGESTED).  9 OUT OF 10 DOCTORS ARE APPARENTLY ON THE TAKE, SO WHEN YOU LOOK FOR MEDICAL ADVICE, MAKE SURE YOU ASK AT LEAST 20 DOCTORS…

Word of the Day: April 24, 2012

Blogomy

 

 

(Blah-Gah-Me)

After leaving home to "go for a coffee", Billy finds himself blogging with another woman.

 

 

1)  The act of writing a blog while still blogging at another site. Some writers like to blog many posts at the same time, which is against Christian morals and many State laws.

 

 

*NOTE;  IF YOU HAVE ANY SUGGESTIONS FOR A FAKE, BLOGGING-RELATED WORD OR ACRONYM THAT YOU LIKE, DESPISE OR USE, PLEASE LEAVE IT AS A COMMENT, ALONG WITH A SHORT DEFINITION AND THE PHONETICS. YOUR SUGGESTIONS WILL BE AN UPCOMING DAILY FEATURE!

 

CONTENTS OF THIS BLOG ARE SUBJECT TO CHANGE WITHOUT NOTICE. WORDS MAY APPEAR CLOSER IN A MIRROR THAN THEY ACTUALLY ARE. 9 OUT OF 10 LIBRARIANS  ARE MOUSEY INTROVERTS, 19 TIMES OUT OF 20, YET STILL MANAGE TO APPEAR TO BE SEXY. THIS SITE IS NOT ENDORSED BY THE SPCB (THE SECOND SPC (SOCIETY FOR THE PREVENTION OF CRUELTY) IN THE PHONE BOOK – THE SPCA (ANIMALS) HOGGED THE FIRST SPOT ON ME AGAIN! THOSE BRUTES!) THE APATHETIC AND APPALLINGLY APROPOS “SOCIETY OF THE PREVENTION OF CRUELTY TO BLOGGERS” (DONATIONS ACCEPTED AND SUGGESTED).  9 OUT OF 10 DOCTORS ARE APPARENTLY ON THE TAKE, SO WHEN YOU LOOK FOR MEDICAL ADVICE, MAKE SURE YOU ASK AT LEAST 20 DOCTORS…

Word of the Day: April 20, 2012

Blogawana

 

(Blah-Gah-Wanna)

Cation; Can make blogs appear much better than they are.

 

 

1)  An herb that can be smoked to make the blogging experience, well, more of an experience. It has the ability to make a blogger write of deep, insightful and humorous subjects.

 

2)  The first name of the delta-blues-folk group “Deltawana Blues”.  Have been an opening act in New Orleans since Hurricane Katrina arrived in the city.

 

3)  What dyslexic bloggers say when they get the need to type; as is “I blog-a-wanna!”

 

 

 

*NOTE;  IF YOU HAVE ANY SUGGESTIONS FOR A FAKE, BLOGGING-RELATED WORD OR ACRONYM THAT YOU LIKE, DESPISE OR USE, PLEASE LEAVE IT AS A COMMENT, ALONG WITH A SHORT DEFINITION AND THE PHONETICS. YOUR SUGGESTIONS WILL BE AN UPCOMING DAILY FEATURE!

CONTENTS OF THIS BLOG ARE SUBJECT TO CHANGE WITHOUT NOTICE. WORDS MAY APPEAR CLOSER IN A MIRROR THAN THEY ACTUALLY ARE. 9 OUT OF 10 LIBRARIANS  ARE MOUSEY INTROVERTS, 19 TIMES OUT OF 20, YET STILL MANAGE TO APPEAR TO BE SEXY. THIS SITE IS NOT ENDORSED BY THE SPCB (THE SECOND SPC (SOCIETY FOR THE PREVENTION OF CRUELTY) IN THE PHONE BOOK – THE SPCA (ANIMALS) HOGGED THE FIRST SPOT ON ME AGAIN! THOSE BRUTES!) THE APATHETIC AND APPALLINGLY APROPOS “SOCIETY OF THE PREVENTION OF CRUELTY TO BLOGGERS” (DONATIONS ACCEPTED AND SUGGESTED).  9 OUT OF 10 DOCTORS ARE APPARENTLY ON THE TAKE, SO WHEN YOU LOOK FOR MEDICAL ADVICE, MAKE SURE YOU ASK AT LEAST 20 DOCTORS…

Word of the Day: March 24, 2012

 Spamalot

Defender of the meek, killer of spammers, Sir Spamalot

 

 

(Spah-Mah-Laht)

 

 

1)  A medieval blogger who posts multiple short posts per day. The thought is that if they can get hundreds of views per day with one blog post, they should be able to get thousands of views with ten short posts.

 

2)  Bloggers who fill your inbox with notices of multiple blog postings per day. Some bloggers post 10 and more blogs per day, with each one being only 3 to 5 sentences long, or showing just 1 or 2 pictures.

 

*note;  Today’s post was brought to you by the Knights Templar, defenders of post readers and bloggers alike.

 

*NOTE;  IF YOU HAVE ANY SUGGESTIONS FOR A FAKE, BLOGGING-RELATED WORD OR ACRONYM THAT YOU LIKE, DESPISE OR USE, PLEASE LEAVE IT AS A COMMENT, ALONG WITH A SHORT DEFINITION AND THE PHONETICS. YOUR SUGGESTIONS WILL BE AN UPCOMING DAILY FEATURE!

CONTENTS OF THIS BLOG ARE SUBJECT TO CHANGE WITHOUT NOTICE. WORDS MAY APPEAR CLOSER IN A MIRROR THAN THEY ACTUALLY ARE. 9 OUT OF 10 LIBRARIANS  ARE MOUSEY INTROVERTS, 19 TIMES OUT OF 20, YET STILL MANAGE TO APPEAR TO BE SEXY. THIS SITE IS NOT ENDORSED BY THE SPCB (THE SECOND SPC (SOCIETY FOR THE PREVENTION OF CRUELTY) IN THE PHONE BOOK – THE SPCA (ANIMALS) HOGGED THE FIRST SPOT ON ME AGAIN! THOSE BRUTES!) THE APATHETIC AND APPALLINGLY APROPOS “SOCIETY OF THE PREVENTION OF CRUELTY TO BLOGGERS” (DONATIONS ACCEPTED AND SUGGESTED).  9 OUT OF 10 DOCTORS ARE APPARENTLY ON THE TAKE, SO WHEN YOU LOOK FOR MEDICAL ADVICE, MAKE SURE YOU ASK AT LEAST 20 DOCTORS…

How Sweet It Is?

Is Short Sweet?

(The scourge of the short post)

The new trend in Blogging seems to be to post as little information as possible. Some bloggers are rolling out at least 10 or more posts a day, with no more than a few sentences per post, expecting their legion of followers to keep up with them, view and comment on their tiny little posts.

Many bloggers are also posting just one to three pictures, with no text, and expect their readers to keep coming back! Now, if the pictures are of amazing places or astounding events, then maybe they can pull it off… but when the pictures are of themselves, or their pets, or their cities or other mundane objects nobody else really gives a rats ass about, well then maybe they should expect to lose about 90% of their followers, if they had any to begin with.

I say, enough is enough!  I really am not interested in how you did your nails tonight!  Maybe if you had bought some sex neglige or something and wanted to show that off at the same time, but just the nails? That’s an all-around no! However, i did notice one such blog with over 20 POSITIVE comments (and no negative ones!) as well as over 100 page views! Okay, so in revenue terms that’s about $0.20 – but still, that’s still telling the poster poser that what they are doing is great! Stop it! Stop it now!

Another 27 words, another $10,000 !!! Woohoo, who said you had to write good, intelligent posts?

Either tell me a story, make me laugh or cry, or show me some amazing pictures that will blow my mind. I don’t want to go through the trouble and time to open a bunch of posts just to see a picture or two of your cats lying on the couch, your boyfriend in bed or your kids with food on their faces; it’s cute to you, but not to me!

If you want to write a short post now and then, with apologies to your fans for not beguiling them with your usual length and witty banter, then the occasional shorty can be acceptable. But too many bloggers are now putting out posts that are shorter than a newswire feed about the newest troubles in Afghanistan, or Israel’s intent to bomb Iran back to the days of Barney and Fred.

The major cities in North America are putting up with a bunch of “Occupy” protests – and we actually need a new one, like “De-Occupy Crappy Blogs”; maybe more people would come out for that one, instead of just the average heroin junkie, homeless people and philosophy grads who couldn’t find jobs after accumulating a couple of hundred thousand dollars in student loans.

So, it’s time to roll out the newest anti-something campaign, and this one is called;

Spas

Also known as – “Short Posts Are Stupid!”

But, spas?  As in more than one Spa? Really?

No, Spas as in Short Posts Are Stupid, stupid! (think spazz but spoken by Snooki!)

Okay, now I will admit to putting out a couple of really short posts, one comes to mind where the title was “Do You Want To Make $10,000 a Day Writing Online”, and the content was, simply, “Me too!”… but that was a joke, and taken as such by my legion of followers. Well, except for one, who let me know in no uncertain terms that what i was doing was stupid beyond comprehension…

Legion? My legion? What am i, a vampire? Self-anointed deity?

Yes, my legion! All 43 of them!

So, with the scourge of short posts in mind…

See you tomorrow!

Word of the Day: February 13, 2012

Blahgger

 

(Blaw-grr)

Blah blah blog sheep, have you any sense?

 

1)  A blogger who writes really boring posts.

 

2)  A person who doesn’t write blogs but posts condescending comments on well written blogs.

 

 

*note;  if you have any suggestions for a fake, blogging-related word or acronym that you like, despise or use, please leave it as a comment, along with a short definition and the phonetics. Your suggestions may well be an upcoming daily feature!

Subject to change without notice. Words may appear closer in a mirror than they actually are. 9 out of 10 librarians  are mousey introverts, 19 times out of 20, yet still manage to appear to be sexy. This site is not endorsed by the SPCB (the second SPC (Society for the Prevention of Cruelty) in the phone book – the SPCA (Animals) hogged the first spot on me again! Those brutes!) the apathetic and appallingly apropos “Society of the Prevention of Cruelty to Bloggers” (donations accepted and suggested).

Word of the Day: January 25, 2012

Narbeccist

 

(nahr-beh-cyst)

 

1) A blogger who thinks that their blog is by far the best thing going. Usually can’t understand why they have few to no followers, and blame their failure on their reader’s lack of intelligence (yeah, that’ll work!)

Suddenly, Jacques realized he wasn't all that he thought he was

2) An egotistic blogger (see #1) who dedicates at least 1 or 2 posts per week on why they are so great, on their accomplishments and their successes. However, most of their great deeds are in their minds, not in reality.

*Another “Word of the Day” as suggested by faithful followers, this one another gem by Red (Ann Marie Dwyer). Thanks, Red! Please check out Red’s award-winning blogs here;

http://mommasmoneymatters.wordpress.com/

 

Subject to change without notice. Words may appear closer in a mirror than they actually are. 9 out of 10 librarians are mousey introverts, 19 times out of 20, yet still manage to appear to be sexy. This site is not endorsed by the SPCB (the second SPC (Society for the Prevention of Cruelty) in the phone book – the SPCA (Animals) hogged the first spot on me again! Those brutes!) the apathetic and appallingly apropos “Society of the Prevention of Cruelty to Bloggers” (donations accepted and suggested).

Successful Blogger or Silly Scammer?

I’m up already!

 

I have been alive for roughly 1.5 Billion seconds. That’s about 1/5th of a second for every person on the planet that I have been drawing breath. While sleeping on average six hours a day, that leaves me awake for over 300 Million seconds. You’d figure that I would have more than enough time during the day to take care of all of my new-found Internet infamy? Well, you’d be wrong. Not about the time, I’ve got lots of that; it’s about the infamy. I don’t want it, but I sure would like the money that comes along with it. So, with that in mind, I have to wonder if James Patterson (the #1 book seller in the world) or Stephen King (‘nough said) would like a ghost writer? Baring that, maybe you could have a few friends take a read of my blog posts, that would help!

The building blocks of all life

Scientists are aware of what approximately 5% of the human DNA model is used for. That leaves 95% of DNA that is now considered as “junk DNA” simply because they don’t know what it’s used for. It could be the complete model of human life, of awareness, of inter-spacial knowledge. With full use, you live eternally, never sick. Or maybe you get egg roll. Who knows?

More scientists believe that a great, alien race of Sumatrans salted the earth with mankind to be used as slave labor in the gold mines for which they had come to our little blue planet, third from the sun, in order to steal our natural resources. Well, if they gave us life, I guess that’s a fair trade off. Funny thing is that if you take the word “God” out of the earlier Bibles and replace that with “Summatran” you get an eerily similar accounting.

What does this mean? Are we only using 5% of our overall potential? Imagine if we were to hit 100% of DNA understanding, and 100% usage of our brains as compared to the 10% maximum that the uber geniuses like Stephen Hawkins use. Just imagine the amazing blogs we could write! Or, with that much intelligence and control over our brains and bodies, maybe we would go back to living nomadic existences.

 

I thought this was about making money blogging?

Me too! Well, it’s also about not falling for work from home job offers and other similarly stupid scams and the poor souls who fall for them, because if you have to pay for work then you’re the customer victim.

 

The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth

Actually, it’s about gaining followers. And, not just any followers, but those who will read your posts daily, and buy things from the advertisers on your posts. That involves finding a niche follower who, on average, have disposable income for spontaneous purchases.

For people who like to make money off of people who are senile, grieving or otherwise susceptible, you just maybe should be nicer to people with things like this in existence…

http://www.milkandcookies.com/link/285339/detail/  (it’s a safe video, checked with Kaspersky, Windows and Norton).

 

Just how long am I going to have to wait?

Some people stop blogging after a few months of not gaining any social stature within the 10,000+ hit club…

Line up! get it?

 

If they’d just stuck with their goals, you never know. It takes just one great blog post to go viral in order for a blogger to taste the sweet nectar of the advertiser email.

 

“Hey, you. You. Yes, you! Wanna make $25?”.

You may get enticed by cheap offers, but if you hold out, or make an intelligent enough of a counter offer, you should be able to make at least $250 per month for a viral blog post, per advertiser. The different advertisers will have different rules and rates, but the average viral blog will have at least 4 – 8 advertisements. If just one reader in every 1,000 makes a purchase at the advertiser’s offered site. Oops! A catch.

 

There’s a sucker born every minute

Fish on!

As P. T. Barnum infamously stated, there’s a sucker born every minute. That’s what email scammers are counting on. The same idiom goes for “companies” that market “real jobs working from home”. Scams. You’re the fish, they the fisherman. Don’t nibble, you might get hooked.

 

How do I get ahead?

If you are to taste the nectar of success, it takes hard work,. You have to try, repeatedly, to make a successful blog series that catches people’s eyes. Think of the 32-yr old virgin male still living in his mom’s basement. He’s had a good life, but wants to settle down. When he gets lucky, he brings the girl home to meet ma. First mistake. It’s like selling out to the first advertiser who offers you a pittance, or a chance at earning from their revenue sharing programs.

 

If you try hard enough, you just might fail miserably!

Try and try again

Just as that 32-yr old will eventually figure out how to seal the deal with a real, non-inflatable girl by taking her to the best hotel in town, getting the penthouse suite and the best champagne, chocolate covered strawberries and aromatic bubble bath, the average blogger will eventually figure out how to make money. They just need to learn from their mistakes, and take each in stride as they come.

Now, the problem happens to be the amount of money that you can expect to make (not much).  If you have a day job, don’t give it up the same day you get accepted into the AdSense revenue program.

 

Did you say hard work?

Aw, come on! I thought I could write 5 to 10 blogs and attain cult-like status! My mom even said that I was special!

If you went to school on a little bus, there’s a chance you could be using a lot less than 7% of your brain, an IQ under 120 (you get 80 just for standing upright!).  If you run some of those stupid scams that keep showing up in my inbox, you probably still do ride on the same bus, and pick on all of the 7 and 8 year old kids who are 2 grades ahead of you in middle school. And, you may be getting something more viral than a scam hoax email in return!

You silly scammer, you!

Word of the day: January 1, 2012

Blogosphere

(blah-goes-fear)

1) The area on the Internet where bloggers write their posts of fear mongering.

2) Where bloggers live, between the atmosphere and the ionosphere.

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