The Ramblings of a Somewhat Unstable Mind

Posts tagged ‘doctor’

Just what does the 10th Doctor Say…???

9 out of 10 doctors agree that Celebrex lessens the effects of arthritis on the human body.

9 out of 10 doctors agree that Lotomax is the best choice for lessening the effects of runny bowels in every day life.

9 out of 10 dentists agree that Crest is the best toothpaste for daily use.

9 out of 10 dentists agree that Colgate is the best toothpaste for daily use.

9 out of 10 dentists agree that Arm & Hammer is the best toothpaste for daily use.

All of these “studies” are true 19 times out of 20. What happens in that 20th poll is what I would like to see: it makes me wonder if that 20th poll had 10 doctors or dentists proclaiming that their patients should never use the medication, as it causes more problems than what it is supposed to cure or alleviate does.

Okay, I’m starting to see a pattern here – there’s a lot of doctors and dentists out there that are sell outs – they are making a lot of money, free golf clubs, memberships and trips from the pharmaceutical companies, toothpaste and oral hygiene companies and manufacturers. Name an ailment, a requirement or a medication and the consumer lobby will find 9 out of 10 doctors, dentists or pharmacists (professional may be portrayed by an amateur actor. 5% less anal leakage is only an approximation and is not a guarantee).

What exactly is it that that 10th doctor, dentist and pharmacist refuses to sell out over? It can’t be because there is only 3% less anal leakage with the new, improved prescription medications and not a full 5%, nor can it be that the 10th dentist doesn’t think that Crest is a good toothpaste for daily use. So, why the hold-outs becomes my first question, and question it I do. I question why they have to pay actors to represent doctors who only represent 90% of their profession, 19 times out of 20.

How many times have you been in to see your doctor or dentist and there was a pharmaceutical sales representative, with their big old box of drugs, standing with the receptionists making small talk? I’m guessing at least 9 out of 10 times, 19 times out of 20. My doctor has a storage closet where they store the freebies, the new and/or improved drugs that they want doctors to prescribe. So, please don’t complain when you take your prescription for Celebrex to the pharmacy, get home and then bury your head in the oven with the gas on. It says right on the commercial that suicide tendencies and increased thoughts of suicide are common side effects of the drug. What’s Celebrex prescribed for? If you guessed depression, give yourself a gold star! I’m guessing that 10th doctor just didn’t want to be part of that big multinational lawsuit from the families of the victims, i mean, patients that took the drug.

Funny thing, I’ve never heard of someone smoking a joint of pot and committing suicide (well, maybe not funny ha ha), and since pot is the best anti-depressant going around, I may just have a suggestion for people who may want to try Celebrex.

Go smoke a big fattie and chillax, dude!Skip out on the pharmaceuticals and step up to the new wave of people using naturally growing plants, weeds and shrubberies. Oh, and nuts. Gotta have (or,m be) nuts!

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