Not all online casinos are fraudulent
No, but most of them are.
How can you tell which are worth visiting and which to avoid?
Well, most, if not all of the legitimate casinos will spend the extra few dollars to have someone write their advertisements for them. They even give out free spins, to try and entice the player in. If the player wins off of their free spins, that amount is deposited into their “Real Money” account for them to play with. (no, you can’t withdraw that, though. You have to play out at least 200 to 500 times the amount of your gift)
They don't call them "one-armed bandits" because of their looks!
These lines are from an email I recently received from “Global Affiliates”, the parent company for “Casino.com” (you really have to love them for their naming, though!)
After refreshing our site we wants you to be our guest and take part at the excitement!
Only first time members on Cc gets one of the generous welcome bonus in the industry!
They make money by having machines that take into account the amount of your wager; the higher you wager, the lower your chances of winning become. As well, they will try to get as much out of you as possible at the beginning, knowing all too well that there is a 95% chance that you won’t be coming back – only the winners really return, or those who think that because they kept getting oh-so-close on so many spins, they’re right on the cusp of winning big. (yes, these people exist, it’s why there are so many online casinos)
Make a deposit, mister!
This has got to be an all-time low even for the online casino industry. We all get them, those ads in our junk-mail boxes that proclaim that we’ve been selected out of everybody who has an Internet connection for a whopping $2400 sign up bonus! (mind you, you do have to deposit about $800 to get that, and play out over $240,000 worth of wagers to cash out even a single penny). We probably came in third, with the first-place winner getting some phenomenal prize, but our 3rd place win is still awesome!
How can you tell an online casino is a sham by their ads or emails?
They claim that if you sign up with them, this is you!
Okay, if you’re going to sell an online casino, which should generate hundreds of thousands to millions of dollars a week in pure profits, the least you could do is have your ads written with proper grammar!
Sure, some people do win jackpots, that’s the nature of gambling; you win some, you lose most. In order to win big, you have to bet really big, and that is a much rarer gambler. However, it is the right move, because winning a 50 to 1 spin on a $2 bet only gets you $100, but change that to a $200 bet, and now you’re getting $10,000…
From their email to me…
Don’t miss your chance to bring home some extra-funds!
This welcome package is available for limited time only.
Don’t waste your time and sign up today.
Now, catch that last line! “Don’t waste your time and sign up today“. Now, that’s truth in advertising! It’s like saying “If you gamble here, we’ve got some bridges for sale too”. They are literally telling you that signing up with them is a complete waste of your time.
Even though this casino was not visited, nor tried out (well, duh! Since I didn’t visit it, didja think I had played there somehow? Well, didja?) this is most definitely an online casino to avoid like the plague. There are some online casinos that offer great odds at winning, and take only minor percentages, knowing that a small amount over a long time is better than a one-time infusion of a few hundred dollars.
Might not approve of online casinos
However, there are also casinos like “Casino.com” which are prime examples of why the USA regulated online casinos out of the country, and almost all major credit cards refuse their customer’s use of their credit cards at the sites, even though they accept the cards.
Come back for more! No charges, no biased reviews!
There will be more posts about online casinos, which to avoid and which to at least have a look at (and some that you absolutely must at least try!). If you have an online casino that you’re curious, or furious about or with, leave a comment and it will be investigated thoroughly.
If you liked this, please let me and others know!
Word of the Day: September 07, 2012
BLEAP
(BleeeP)
With free speech now no more than a memory, bloggers have to find phuqing inventive ways to get around the opening-keesters who work for the censorship bureau!
1) The acronym for the ever-helpful group of non-greedy and selflessly giving bloggers and writers, “Bloggers Lending Expert Advice for Provision”. This is the nicest group in the bloggosphere, nary asking for anything whilst giving in-depth tips and even performing formatting and other tricky tasks for writers and bloggers alike.
2) The sound made by censors as they strike out innocent enough comments, phrases and/or words contained within otherwise well-written blog posts. Since swear words are not allowed, bloggers must write “That bleaping bleaper of a bleap!”.
*NOTE; HELP!!! IF YOU HAVE ANY SUGGESTIONS FOR A FAKE, BLOGGING-RELATED WORD OR ACRONYM THAT YOU LIKE, DESPISE OR USE, PLEASE LEAVE IT AS A COMMENT, ALONG WITH A SHORT DEFINITION AND THE PHONETICS. YOUR SUGGESTIONS WILL BE AN UPCOMING DAILY FEATURE!
Rate this:
If you liked this, please let me and others know!
Category:
Entertainment, social commentary, Things I Think I Thunk, Thoughts I thought I thought., Word of the Day, Word of the Day, Writers and Writing
Tagged with: